Elena Cardone: [00:02:56] Great. Thanks for having me.

Elena Cardone: [00:03:07] No. I believe confidence comes from doing what you say that you’re going to do. And if you do that consistently for long periods of time, I believe that’s what develops confidence. So, no, I wasn’t always like this because I never I used to let myself off the hook. I didn’t always do what I said I was going to do. I made excuses or whatnot. And so when you let yourself down and you don’t really believe in yourself and you’ve accumulated enough losses with yourself, it’s hard to have confidence and think that you can achieve much. But once you do those kind of things, it’s kind of hard not to have confidence in yourself.

Elena Cardone: [00:03:49] And yeah, I have to do what I say I’m going to do.

Elena Cardone: [00:04:01] I don’t really give myself consequences. I mean, I’m naturally. I’ve actually had to work to become my own best friend because I used to be really brutal on myself. You know, just mentally when I had a failure or didn’t keep my word or something like that. And now I’m just sort of learn to kind of forgive myself, learn from it, move on or make the adjustment. And I don’t try to do that that invalidation thing so much anymore. But yes, it definitely more myself accountable. I know the targets that I’m going for. I know my purpose. I know who I’m trying to represent to myself and to the world. I don’t write my goals down every day like Grant does and a lot of other people do. And I know that is a successful action. I personally don’t do it, but I do hold myself accountable for that because I know how important it is. It’s so important to do what you say you’re going to do, because when you start establishing these goals for yourself that are extremely unrealistic. It’s easy for the universe. Forget everybody else that just looks at you and wants to laugh at you. The universe will believe you. But you start doing what you say and showing up enough times over and over and over. Then eventually you can get to the point where you can say, Oh, I’m going to be a billionaire as everyone is, just like, believe you. They’re like you. Of course she’s going to be a billionaire. Why wouldn’t she? She does everything she says she’s going to do. And I think the universe at that point surrenders and goes, you know, no one messing with her. I’m going to go pick an easier target.

Elena Cardone: [00:05:56] Yeah. And you actually start having more energy. Tired, I believe tired comes from a similar type thing of not doing what you say you’re going to do, but also failing or not giving yourself a little some targets along the way because sometimes the goal is unattainable. I want to reach 7 billion people on the planet. I don’t know if I’m actually going to achieve that this lifetime. Yes. You know, but it’s a goal that is so big that it makes me have to push and shove and work and fight every single day of my life to go for that goal and not be petty on the little small things or getting into fights with Grant or whatever, because the goal is so big that we both have that that that’s what I need to keep me focused.

Elena Cardone: [00:06:42] But the tiredness, I believe comes from when you’ve had too many losses and you’ve accumulated too many losses or you’re not having enough wins to keep you going. That’s when you get tired. But when you’re doing things and hitting little targets, it doesn’t have to be the huge ones. It could just be. I’m going to drink my water. I’m going to eat healthy, I’m going to work out or whatever, or I’m going to write in my purpose down every morning or night. The little things. But if you can consistently do it, you’ll find that you start generating more energy within yourself.

Elena Cardone: [00:07:39] And you can start off with one hundred thousand or a million. You know, it’s OK. But as you go along, you know, increase the approach. I just I go for big. I’m not aware. Why do you think women have this?

Elena Cardone: [00:09:17] Yeah, exactly. I know what you’re saying about that now is the Ask and I don’t know where it comes from. But the solution is a woman has to understand what involves in the finances and what it takes to run an empire, expanding an empire. It’s like what you said. You know, not only calculating the time, but the value and what you have. And once you understand what it takes to run it, then you understand what your bear needs are and then ask a little bit over that. So maybe they just haven’t done the basic math on what it takes to survive. Yeah. And to run like write down all the bills that you have. You know, the clothes, the hair, the nails. I mean, we’re just we cost more. The money gets, you know what I’m saying? But once you understand your value and what you have to exchange, you know, it’s all made up. That’s the thing. The money is all an illusion. You’re just going to put a price on it. It’s just it’s a made up number anyway. Who is the one that quantifies the value? You know, but if you can own that and understand it and then just sell the value.

Elena Cardone: [00:10:26] So it is difficult. I have a tendency to want to give everything away for free as well, especially because I think we’re caring or nurturing or loving we want to give. But you also have to be able to monetize because we live on an economic planet. So, you know, you can’t buy diapers with a hug. You know?

Elena Cardone: [00:10:48] Yes. I think that’s also where the confidence piece kicks in a little bit. You know, it’s like when you really know your value and you know, your worth, your confident putting a price on that and charging what you’re worth. Yeah. And also for these corporations, if you so undervalue yourselves, then you aren’t legitimate in their eyes. They’re going to see you as not having the expertise when something comes in really low under market value. It makes me nervous. I’m expecting to pay more. So when it comes in really low, I think they’re amateur. I almost would rather pay for more and know what I’m getting and be certain that I’m getting that rather than going with the cheaper route because it makes me so afraid that that it’s not can deliver. Right. Yeah. And it’s I always use this analogy of a purse. If you spend $10 on a purse, you’re going to treat it one way. If you spend a thousand dollars on a purse, eventually the other way million percent. It’s why I feel like there are certain things that I have to charge for, even though I’m at a place in my life where I really don’t have to. I’m in a financially free, stable condition in my life. But if I give everything away for free, it’s like the $10 purse you’re talking about. It’s not either going to be taken seriously or whatever. Someone is forced to invest time and energy, money, time and money into something they’re going to. Then want that back in exchange for it. So it’s very important to give the exchange for your goods and products and services. It goes both ways. Right.

Elena Cardone: [00:12:43] A newlywed couple has to start, I believe, in understanding what your goals are together as a couple because everyone has their individual goals. And those are very important to life, definitely keep those orphans to a column of in and of themselves, but your individual goals should feed into the couple’s goal because you’re a unit now and two is stronger than one. And in the intro you said it’s this is half of the Cardone Empire. Grant and I don’t see each other as half and half. We see each other as one hundred percent and one hundred percent. So our 200 percent is going to dominate anyone else who’s thinking, 50 50. And it just gives me a leg up.

Elena Cardone: [00:13:29] So the couples go find out who you are. Do you? Are you all the arguing couple, the fighting couple, over the small things? Or do you want to be the brand new newlywed couple that gives that is a model royal couple to other couples that can be a stable force in your community to say this is who we are. And how do you as a couple get yourself to be greater than who you are by yourself? Because you can do that by yourself. You don’t need somebody else to do that. So why is it that you’re in the relationship? Is it just to be monogamous with one person for the rest of your life? Is it just to be told that you’re loved and appreciated from time to time? Is that all you want or do you want to go to this level? And how can you push each other and help each other and be each other’s support and wings to get each other to that next level and figure that out so that you could start figuring out then, well, what is your purpose? What is the purpose together? And focus on that and understand that you’re a team, you know, trying to win this thing called the World Cup or whatever it is. And in doing that, you don’t beat up your team members even when you fall down or flanker, you know, fumble the ball in game three.

Elena Cardone: [00:14:45] You know, the sports analogy. Football. We have an, you know, in the states. You know, I’m not going to continue to hammer on him about how he messed up in great, great Game 3 when we’re trying to win the Super Bowl, you know? Right. You’ve got to leave the past in the past. Learn from it and move on as quickly as possible. Yeah. And really see each other as a team, figure out who does what in the relationship based on your strengths and weaknesses. That also helps because especially in the beginning, you maybe never been married before. You’re trying to sort yourself out. You’re used to being independent. Now you have to deal with somebody else. Maybe you’re vying for the power position or you know, you’re used to doing something a certain way. So if you could figure out based on your strengths and weaknesses, not necessarily male, female, the strengths and weaknesses, and then you run that division. If you’re an amazing accountant and run numbers and, you know, finances, maybe you handle all the money or you know, you oversee it. You write the checks you do this year and maybe, you know, whatever. If he does another department like marketing and social media for your business, then he runs that. So that win, that means you relinquish the control in that area. You’re the boss. You can advise or whatever, but you support the decision of each other in that area and let them run the department. And if something falls short, then you’re like, hey, step up the program here and this or that. But you’re not at least fighting each other for the power position. You each have your power position, so you’re not feeling like you have to prove yourself in some area because you’re you know, you want to be the boss.

Elena Cardone: [00:16:42] Yeah. It’s interesting this conversation that women have where we’re trying to be these independent women and proving to the world and guys are not having this conversation with themselves. They’re not running around saying, I have to be independent. Guys in this area, I believe are a lot smarter than women, which we can actually learn from them because guys, they will do whatever it takes. They will use whoever to get wherever they want to be. They’re not having this issue. They don’t have a problem helping somebody else or being help. They’re like they’ll use them. And I think we cut our noses off despite our face by having this – I have to do it all on my own. I have to be independent. We’re just holding ourselves that much further behind than they are. And in that regard, I will admit that they’re smarter than us because they’re not they’re using everything to their advantage. And we should be doing that, too.

Elena Cardone: [00:18:00] And no one can do it as good as you like. Even when I had to hire a babysitter nanny for the first time and you know, it’s just being willing to delegate and let somebody else run that department so you can prioritize and do make the most of your time and where it’s more valued and how you can make more of it. You know.

Elena Cardone: [00:18:42] We’ve been together for sixteen and a half.

Elena Cardone: [00:18:46] And you’re working together, too? Yeah. And we worked together, too, because we haven’t figured out who does what. And it’s clearly delineated. And even though we’re equal in marriage, we are not equal in the business. I mean, Grant is an exceptional kind of freak where not many people on the planet, I feel can can compete with him with what he knows financially, with real estate, with marketing, social media, what he knows about running businesses. So. So me trying to compete on his level with them is I’m smarter than that. So he’d run that department and not division. And he’s never let me down. And he really is an expert. So the secret to long lasting kind of relationships is what I say is fine. The one you trust and build an empire. I think the love is a given sort of circumstance. You’re not going to marry someone you’re not in love with. Why would you do them? I don’t understand that thinking, you know. But when you’re in a long relationship like 16 years, there are days, if any one is willing to be honest, where might doubt my love for this man.

Elena Cardone: [00:20:03] There are certain days when we’re in a fight or we’re angry or, you know, it’s blood, sweat and tears days, you know, and there’s friction. And I’m like, oh, my God, I don’t even know if I love this guy anymore, much less in love with the guy. But even on those days, I can be trusted to fulfil my role in the relationship and show up 100 percent, not talk behind his back, have his back and still be willing to protect him and vice versa. And so when you can trust someone to deliver on the days, even when you doubt that love, you know. But if you are just like find the one you love, then when those days show up, you’re like, I don’t love him. How?

Elena Cardone: [00:20:44] But I say, find the one you trust because we have such immense amount of trust and respect for one another that even on those days, I still show up and love him. And then when you come out of those days, because they don’t last long, but they are there, here and there, you know, we have a ninety five five and which I think is incredible. I’m like ninety five percent of the time we’re vibing and everything’s fallen in 5 percent of the time. We’re like, you know. So that’s the big thing is and you develop the trust by same thing. Do you say you’re going to do in the relationship by being honorable, by having integrity? When you get in a fight or an argument, you’re not running out flirting with guys at a bar, even just a flirt. It takes a toll, you know, because, you know, you shouldn’t be doing it, much less, God, if you go out and cheat on the relationship, that’s that’s a yes. You just took it out the park, you know? Right. I’m talking even little things nattering to your girlfriends or to the guy friends about, oh, she’s this or that. Even those little things take a toll on the relationship that really you have to have discipline to keep your mouth shut and not try to go get sympathy from your girlfriends or need to be heard or asked what to do. You’re smart. You’re intelligent. You don’t need to know what to do from your girlfriend, who doesn’t know what it’s like to be with a powerful, successful, entrepreneurial man. They’re probably single. They want what’s best for you. They’re probably not going to give you the best advice for you. They’re trying to tell you how to be the best advice from their reality. But chances are it’s not your reality. So we keep our own counsel and figure it out for ourselves. And then after we’ve figured some things out, then I feel like I can talk about certain issues, but I’ll never talk about issues when I’m going through.

Elena Cardone: [00:22:40] It is. Because then the problem is, as you make up with the boyfriend, the spouse, whoever, whomever he make up with them. But then you’re you’ve just, you know, dumped literally on your friends about him. They’re stuck with it. And so they don’t go back into the relationship and see his side. Which makes sense to you, because now you can own up to what you did, you know, and they don’t see his side and then you’re back together and then you’re like, oh, my gosh, isn’t it great? Well, no, you just dumped on him. So they’re sitting with that. And then as time goes on, they’ll remind you or they’ll bring it back up where it comes back up. And you thought you were over the issue. But now it’s re-back in your mind and then you get back together with him and then you’re like, oh, they said that thing that you complained about, like always so hard on me. And then I said, but he’s always so hard on you. And just to give you a break and then you’re like. And then the next thing you know, you’re are fighting over the same thing all over again when it should have been done. So, yeah, that’s why the analogy of the empire works so well in regards to this, because let’s just take for analogy sake, OK? You have the king and you’re the queen of the empire. Well, the queen or the king would never go like a queen would never go to a chambermaid. Of course, your friends are not your chambermaids. But again, the analogy, a queen would never go to a chambermaid and ask for advice about what to do with the king. I mean, when you wear the crown, you have to take on a whole another level of responsibility. And you can no longer be selfish enough to think only about yourself. You have to think about who you are as a king and as a queen. And there are certain things as a king and a queen, you just can no longer you no longer afford that luxury.

Elena Cardone: [00:24:52] And in our culture, at least in America, you know, we’re taught to talk about our feelings. And we have our girlfriends. And I love my girlfriends, but my girlfriends or my friends are there my support to support me and becoming a powerful woman. My girlfriends are not my therapist. My girlfriends are like, why would you put that on anyone? Why would you assign somebody an expert in a field that isn’t the expert?

Elena Cardone: [00:25:21] You know, like I would seek counsel from a woman who maybe would be the similarities were enough if she was if she was married to an extremely powerful entrepreneurial type man, if she had been in a long term relationship, if she had children that she had reared that were happy, healthy, productive members contributing in society without drug addictions and all these other things. And I could see myself going to that woman saying, I admire how can you help? Can you help me? Can you give me advice on this or what do you do in this scenario? I would do that. But if a woman does not have the stats that are equal or higher than me, there’s no way there’s no way I’m going to place my friends under that burden.

Elena Cardone: [00:26:25] Well, I don’t always. But, you know, because there’s moments where it leaks out. But for the most part, when you are on your purpose and you’re winning. And people can work with each other and you figured out how to work well with your unit and your team. Things shouldn’t be overwhelming. And when things do get really over whelming, overwhelming, when many things are coming in, a lot of the times at one time, I will just pick one thing. You know, the confusion happens when you feel like there’s so much going on. If there was if you threw a bunch of papers up into the air and they were all flying around, you would get the sensation that there was overload. But if you threw a bunch a piece of paper in the air and you focused on one and grabbed the one piece of paper that would become your one stable datum to then calculate how to put all the rest of the pieces in order after that. And that’s just what I do. I focus on the one thing, not all the chaos. Right. And it really helps me.

Elena Cardone: [00:27:44] When I’m in Miami, I have to train. I train martial arts. So I do boxing Muay Thai. I’m starting to learn the Brazilian jujitsu. And I trained for about an hour, an hour and a half every day. And I have to wake up early to do that in order to accomplish everything that I need to do during the day. And that really helps me. It’s something I recently discovered within the last two years, but now it’s like something I can’t live without.

Elena Cardone: [00:28:13] It helps me not only physically and talk about confidence. Like I had never thrown a punch before in my life before. I mean, not like a real one. When I was a kid, 19 years old, and you fight with the neighborhood kids. And that’s how we work. That’s how I grew up. But not as an adult. I’ve never been in a fight or anything. But I mean, just the confidence of actually learning how to throw an elbow and knee, kick a punch. And it’s because I never thought of myself as being able to. And to be able to take a hit and defend yourself, that builds confidence for me. So it helps me in many different ways. Not only does it help me physically get a workout, but mentally it helps me. I just get this endorphin release every single time I train. And then the confidence comes out. Confidence not meaning I ever think I can get in a fight and win against a man, you know, like I’m not delusional. Not that kind of confidence, but confidence of doing what I set out to do and training myself and getting better every day.

Elena Cardone: [00:29:16] And, you know, I literally train with UFC fighters that I see on TV in an octagon. And these guys come at you and it’s scary for me and overwhelming. And then I’m fighting them and having to spar with them. And then I go on in life and have to speak in front of people. And suddenly, even though I might be a little nervous to do that, it’s a lot easier than facing these. Actually, they look like monsters, but they are the sweetest, most incredible teddy bear of guys that have such patience with me that I just I love it. You see, I mean, yes. Transcends into life. When I can face these guys that are coming at me with head to toe tied tooth and, you know, act like they’re going to kill me, but they never would. All the sudden in life, I can walk up to someone and look them in the eye and shake their hand and say, hi, my name’s Elena Cardone. How are you? You know, to a complete stranger, it’s less scary. It’s it’s amazing. So I have to do that every day.

Elena Cardone: [00:30:43] It helps me big time, you know, and you know, it’s an incredible world that I’ve been exposed to with the martial arts world and I’ve done martial arts literally around the world on my global world tours. I’ve trained in Abu Dhabi with a black belt there and, you know, all over in Thailand. And and it’s very, very similar type of person that understands that world. And I have never been treated with disrespect, only respect. And they train you hard. And they see you as an equal in martial arts, you know? Of course, they would never hit me as hard as they would hit a man. And I appreciate that. I wish to tell him to stay away from the bad guys. Grab one else to murder me. On man. Yeah. It’s not good. It doesn’t cover, right? Yeah, I go. I’m out of 6000 people and I have to speak with a black guy. It’s just does not look good.Yeah. Well yeah. It happens.

Elena Cardone: [00:32:01] Well, from Grant and ours perspective, but more from Grant’s. I really want to I get behind and support Grant’s. I want to cure the financial illiteracy on the planet. So that’s part of my legacy, too. That’s why I tell you about the empire, because that aspect of an empire is very crucial. Like you need an arsenal. Money is freedom. Money buys time. It buys opportunities. If it’s just a brilliant thing, like you’ve got to get your head wrapped around this thing called money and get rid of all the negative ideas that you have about it. That is actually preventing you from having it. So I want to handle the financial illiteracy on the planet on that in terms of building an empire. The seven billion people, I want to bring the concept. Expansion, big ideas and especially relationships. I want to bring the family life back to being cool and relationships back to being cool and the benefit of those and how you can be better together even though it takes work. It’s not easy. But you know what? If you’re going for the gold medal, chances are you will have put it had to put in some again, blood, sweat and tears. So that’s what I want. I want I want to help people actually change. That should free all their life by implementing something that they heard from myself or from Grant to actually make a difference in somebody else’s life so that they can make a difference for the better, too. We all kind of perpetuated that. That could be big.

Elena Cardone: [00:34:07] But understand, whether you have a partner in the bedroom or not, you are going to have a partner, you’re gonna have a business partner. You’re going to. You can think you can not do it alone. No one’s ever done it alone. It is impossible. And that’s a different kind of impossible than the 7 billion people goal because now and actually might be attainable someday. But this one is impossible. No one’s ever built a real empire alone. The king of Dubai has a whole army of people that protect and expand and grow that empire so can’t be done alone. But everyone a lot of people are under the misconception that they can do it alone and be single. Fine. I don’t care what you do in your bedroom, but you’ll never be. Get over the idea of being single. You’re going to have to get somebody else on the same page. Whether it’s the person you’re sleeping with or the person who’s working side by side with you or whoever from there, you have to know basic fundamentals of what I’m talking about with this empire thing.

Elena Cardone: [00:35:23] If you know that you have a certain potential, you’ve got to like die in the process, so go for greatness and going for greatness. You are actually not being selfish. You’re being willing to exchange that with the world. And I believe that will bring more happiness and health, because I think everything sort of aligns when you know who you are and you know what you’re made of and you’re willing to go for that and be bigger and better than your normal little self. Even if you fall short of your goals, you’re gonna be so far ahead of where you were if you just were complacent on doing nothing. So go for greatness is is the way for happier, healthier and in all areas go for greatness.

Elena Cardone: [00:36:19] They can go to elenacardone.com or you can follow me on any social medium at elenacardone.com. If you want to grab the How to build the Empire book for free, you can go to a elenacardone.com/empire.